When It’s Ok For A “Mums Fail” – An Honest, Real Life Story.

I taught my boys that even parents fly off the handle once in a while. They are not the only ones allowed to throw themselves on the floor and have a good cry session over absolutely nothing.

MumFail #2,187

I keep telling myself there is no such thing as perfect. I am well aware that a perfect parent and a perfect child does not exist. Then why do I still feel guilty as a mum?

Today I lost it. It was so bad I sent myself to my room for a much-needed time out. What launched my insane out of body moment?

Homework! Yep, homework. I loathe homework. My little guy who is five just started having assignments to do. He has watched his brothers complete their assignments over the years and has always asked me to make fake homework for him. The fact he is excited about homework and has a good attitude about it truly makes me happy. I think I may have screwed that up.

If you like this post then check out some of the other Real Life Parenting Stories.

To an adult, blending two letters to make a sound is as simple as it gets. To a five-year-old, not so much. After repeating this sound for what seemed like 100 times over and over and over again, I had had enough. “AT! AT! AT! CAT! HAT! BAT!” Nothing, he was not grasping the concept.

I could feel my blood starting to boil. I even told myself to calm down, take a deep breath and stay patient. I clearly didn’t listen. When I held up one of his index cards with “AT” on it, hoping the last 20 minutes had sunk in, he said, “I don’t know”. Really? I then went batsh*t crazy. I let my frustration get the best of me. How could he not get it?I taught my boys that even parents fly off the handle once in a while. They are not the only ones allowed to throw themselves on the floor and have a good cry session over absolutely nothing.

Meanwhile, my eight-year-old was whining in my ear about helping him with his homework. “Why are you helping him instead of me?” “You never help me”. AHHHHH! Now I lost it on him. “Really? I never help you? Last week I handed you your assignment on a silver platter. I even read the same book as you so I could help you. Really?” I wanted him to do this on his own because I knew he could. Between the alphabet and the whining, I told everyone to leave me alone and escaped upstairs.

I knew I was being a horrible mum but couldn’t stop myself from expressing my irritation. I was having a full-blown temper tantrum.

My 11-year-old noticed and in his usual calm and understanding tone, asked me what was wrong. He assured me I am the best mum in the whole world and proceeded to tell his brothers to give me a break. Love him!

I later apologised and explained why I blew up. I didn’t excuse their behaviour but admitted my reaction to it was less than pretty. It was a great example of demonstrating to my kids that no one is flawless, not even Mummy.

I taught my boys that even parents fly off the handle once in a while. They are not the only ones allowed to throw themselves on the floor and have a good cry session over absolutely nothing.

My kids are my world and I was disappointed in myself. At the same time though, I am human. I have feelings and limits too.

We are going to have a ton of #MumFails in our parenting career and if anyone tells you otherwise, they are lying. I believe in sharing these #Mumtastrophes, so mums everywhere know we are not alone.

What are your #MumFails?

Together We Can Master Motherhood!™

I taught my boys that even parents fly off the handle once in a while. They are not the only ones allowed to throw themselves on the floor and have a good cry session over absolutely nothing.

 

Ellie Hirsch is the founder of MommyMasters.com, a parenting resource offering unique tips, tricks and tools, including her award-winning children’s educational music. She shares her secrets to mastering it all and inspires women around the world. Learn more at MommyMasters.com.

 

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13 Comments

  1. November 14, 2017 / 1:49 pm

    Sometimes it hard not to let your emotions show but its great that you are able to share the reasons why.

    • November 21, 2017 / 5:28 am

      Thanks Vicki! Appreciate you reading and commenting!

  2. November 15, 2017 / 10:53 am

    We can all have those moments where things get too much for us. I’ve noticed that it’s a good tool to teach our kids though when it does happen. We are working on sharing and not hitting when things don’t go our way, and I’ve been trying to get my sons to use their voices instead of words. When they see me getting stressed out and raising my voice, although I try not to do it often, they see a better coping mechanism than lashing out.It’s also nice to have a roaring session when you see you’re getting stressed, you can stop whatever you’re all trying to do and just roar for a while, everyone dissolves into fits of giggles and can get back to it afterwards, haha. My two are a lot smaller though!

    • November 21, 2017 / 5:29 am

      I love using laughter and humor as a parent. It alleviates all the tension and sometimes, you just have to laugh! Thanks for sharing.

  3. November 15, 2017 / 1:15 pm

    I so appreciate you being real and not trying to pretend that your perfect! We all have our less than pretty moments but that’s what makes us human, the ability to have those moments and learn from them and never have the same less than pretty moment twice!

    • November 21, 2017 / 5:30 am

      That means a lot Karlee! We are SO not perfect and have to remind ourselves of that sometimes. Actually, our kids remind us all the time! LOL

  4. November 16, 2017 / 2:26 pm

    I lost it last week too. Homework is so stressful’! I feel your pain! And it’s hard to be one person for two. You’re doing an awesome job!! We just can’t beat ourselves up too much!

    • November 21, 2017 / 5:31 am

      Yes, homework can be so irritating. I feel so silly after I get upset about homework. So many other things to stress about. In the moment though, it seems like the worst thing in the world. Thanks for reading!!!

  5. November 18, 2017 / 6:39 am

    I am so with you, I do have experience it sometimes and then feel bad about it. Recently I and my kids have started reading a book where they have explained that everybody has a bucket and when it is full, people have a bad mood. So when my kids see me in the angry or sad mood, they come to me and kiss me to fill my bucket. And I do vice-versa.

    • ImperfectMummy
      Author
      November 18, 2017 / 6:58 am

      My son was taught this in pre-school. I love it!

    • November 21, 2017 / 5:32 am

      So cute! what a great idea!

  6. November 19, 2017 / 9:46 am

    Awww don’t be too hard on yourself dear! I can tell you’re doing just great 🙂 I Can imagine that as a mom, dealing with this kind of situation is not easy. I am sure your youngest appreciate all you help! He’ll get the hang of it 🙂

    • November 21, 2017 / 5:33 am

      Thanks Tatiane! So nice to hear that once in a while. Homework has gotten a lot better. We have all been more patient which makes a huge difference!

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